Testimonials

This book does a great job of dismantling the harmful belief that change should be instant, like flipping a switch. I appreciated how it traced the roots of this myth to family systems, self-help, culture, and societal pressures for quick fixes, showing why so many of us feel 'broken' when growth takes time. What stood out most was the reminder that setbacks are not proof of failure but part of the natural nonlinear process of change. I highly recommend it.

— Sarah

Reading this book felt like it was speaking directly to me. I've always carried the pressure of 'just do it,' and the guilt when I couldn't sustain changes. What resonated most for me was the reminder that slipping back isn't failure, it's part of the process. The section on family expectations hit home for me because it made me realize where my inner critic's voice came from. I walked away with a lighter perspective. I don't have to flip a switch, I can take one steady step at a time. Thank you.

— Cyndy

Reading The Light Switch Myth felt like you were walking beside me, reminding me gently that real change isn't about flipping a switch but about taking one step at a time. One line that stayed with me was, 'We are not broken for struggling, we are human for unfolding.' That completely shifted how I see my setbacks. Instead of judging myself, I am learning to meet those moments with compassion.

Your metaphor of untangling Christmas lights really captured my reality. I've often felt like I'm revisiting the same struggles again and again, but now I see that repetition isn't wasted effort, it's part of growth. The reflection question, 'Whose voice does your inner critic sound like?' was also powerful for me. It made me realize how much of the pressure I carry inside me isn't even my own but inherited expectations.

What I gained from your book is hope, the kind that doesn't come from promises of instant change, but from the freedom to grow at my own pace. You gave me permission to be human and reminded me that as long as I keep walking down the road, I am moving forward.

Thank you for writing this book. It's not just a book, it's a companion on my journey.

— Glory

“One of the things I’ve struggled with is being really hard on myself and feeling like I have to change everything right away. I have struggled with perfectionism in my life, and that kind of thinking usually just leaves me paralyzed . I came across a book called The Light Switch Myth, and so far I’ve found it to be a really helpful resource.”

— J.W

“Good morning,

I want to start by saying what a gift you are offering to others with sharing your knowledge and understanding of healing. I think it was a beautiful mix between information and reflective opportunities. Using language that makes sense to others is key and I think you accomplish that.

I thought it was a great read.

Thank you for sharing,.”

— Anonymous MSW, RCSW (Clinical Counselor Reviewed for Ethics and Accuracy)

““So far I thinks it’s interesting, easy to read and comprehend. Also well written.

PS, I haven’t read a book in 22 years!"

— K.L.

Full Reviews


5 outof 5 🌟

Kerisma A. Vere’s The Light Switch Myth: A Beginner’s Guide to Creating Realistic and Sustainable Change is a refreshing and compassionate antidote to the culture of quick fixes and instant transformations. In a world overflowing with “10 steps to success” formulas and promises of overnight results, this book reminds us that meaningful change is neither linear nor immediate. Instead, Vere offers readers an empowering perspective: change is a process, deeply personal, and best approached with patience, self-compassion, and realistic expectations.

What makes this book particularly compelling is its foundation in lived experience and trauma-informed practice. Vere acknowledges the struggles many of us know all too well—being overly self-critical, chasing perfection, and feeling discouraged when change doesn’t happen quickly enough. Rather than adding to the pressure, she reframes these challenges in a way that feels validating and liberating. Her message is clear: you don’t need to transform overnight to be worthy of growth.

The strength of The Light Switch Myth lies in its balance between warmth and practicality. Vere’s voice is relatable and encouraging, but she doesn’t stop at inspiration. The book is filled with reflective prompts, practical exercises, and original imagery that guide readers to explore their own relationship with change. She emphasizes the importance of building supportive structures, aligning with personal values, and cultivating internal motivation—all of which make sustainable progress possible. The tools she provides are simple but powerful, encouraging readers to shift away from shame-based cycles and toward self-compassionate practices that foster long-term resilience.

One of the standout aspects is how Vere dismantles the myth implied by the title: that change is like flipping a light switch—instant, complete, and irreversible. Instead, she shows that growth is more like tending a garden—sometimes messy, requiring ongoing care, and unique to each individual. This metaphor resonates throughout the book, creating a sense of permission for readers to move at their own pace.

The tone throughout is deeply humane. Vere doesn’t speak from a pedestal but as a fellow traveler who has wrestled with unrealistic expectations herself. This relatability makes the book accessible to anyone, regardless of where they are in their journey of personal growth. Whether you’re trying to break old habits, create healthier routines, or simply learn to treat yourself with more kindness, her insights feel both relevant and attainable.

The Light Switch Myth is more than just a guidebook—it’s an invitation to rethink how we define progress and success. Vere empowers readers to let go of perfectionism, embrace patience, and commit to growth that lasts. For anyone tired of quick fixes and ready to explore sustainable change, this book is a compassionate and practical companion.

Written by Mrutyunjaya Sahu Oct 1 2025 (Goodreads.com)

5 outof 5 🌟

Kerisma A. Vere’s The Light Switch Myth is a compassionate, insightful guide for anyone who has ever felt defeated by the false promise of “overnight transformation.” Instead of offering yet another rigid system or quick-fix formula, Vere invites readers to take a gentler, more human approach to change—one rooted in self-compassion, values, and sustainability.

What makes this book stand out is its honesty. Vere acknowledges the pressure we place on ourselves—the perfectionism, the spirals of shame, the disappointment when results don’t come quickly—and dismantles the myth that real growth can be flipped on like a light switch. Through personal recovery stories, professional coaching insights, and trauma-informed practices, she provides tools and reflective prompts that help readers understand why change often feels so difficult and how to approach it differently.

The book shines in its use of original imagery and relatable constructs, making complex concepts feel accessible. Instead of dictating one “right way,” it empowers readers to design their own path, creating supportive structures while nurturing inner motivation and worth.

Warmly written and deeply practical, The Light Switch Myth is not just about creating change—it’s about changing the way we relate to change. It’s perfect for anyone tired of unrealistic expectations and ready to embrace growth that is slow, steady, and truly sustainable.

Written by Ultimate World Oct 2, 2025 (Goodreads.com)

5 outof 5 🌟

This book feels like a gentle coach in your corner. Kerisma’s writing is encouraging, realistic, and full of empathy. I found myself nodding along and taking notes on ways to be kinder to myself while working toward my goals. The exercises are actionable, and the stories make the concepts stick. I’ve already recommended it to friends who struggle with “all or nothing” thinking, it’s the kind of book you can return to again and again.

Written by Corine Owen Oct 2, 2025 (Goodreads.com)

5 outof 5 🌟

The Light Switch Myth by Kerisma A. Vere is an inspiring and compassionate exploration of what it truly means to create lasting change. In a world where people are constantly told to transform their lives instantly and chase perfection, Vere challenges that illusion with honesty and grace. She reveals that change is not something that happens suddenly, like flipping a light switch, but something that unfolds gradually through understanding, patience, and consistent self-compassion.

Drawing deeply from her personal recovery journey, coaching experience, and trauma-informed practice, Vere offers a perspective that feels both wise and deeply human. She speaks directly to those who have struggled with self-criticism, burnout, and the disappointment that often follows failed attempts to change. Instead of promising quick results, she provides readers with tools that help them connect with their values, reshape their self-talk, and build a foundation for genuine growth.

What makes this book exceptional is its warmth and authenticity. Vere writes with empathy, offering reflections and exercises that guide readers to think about why they want to change and how they can do it in a way that truly fits their lives. Her tone is understanding rather than prescriptive, and her focus on sustainability ensures that the lessons she shares can be applied long after the final page. Each concept is made accessible through vivid imagery and relatable examples, which help readers internalize the message that progress is not linear but deeply personal.

Vere’s approach dismantles the unrealistic expectations that often lead people to give up on themselves. She invites readers to view change as an ongoing relationship with self-awareness rather than a final destination. The message is clear and empowering—growth takes time, but it is possible when built on kindness, purpose, and patience.

The Light Switch Myth is not just a guidebook but a conversation with the reader, one that encourages self-acceptance while still striving for improvement. It offers hope for anyone who feels trapped in cycles of perfectionism and self-doubt, reminding them that real transformation begins with gentleness and honesty.

Kerisma A. Vere has written a book that speaks directly to the heart of personal development. It is practical yet soulful, structured yet deeply human. For anyone seeking a path to change that honors their pace and their humanity, The Light Switch Myth stands as an essential and transformative read.

Written by Jithendra Jithu Oct 4, 2025 (Goodreads.com)

5 outof 5 🌟

*The Light Switch Myth* refuses that template, not because it lacks structure, but because Kerisma A. Vere recognizes that change is less like assembling furniture and more like cultivating a garden. You don’t hammer growth into place; you nurture it, tend to it, and sometimes wait through long, silent seasons before anything sprouts.

What struck me most while reading is that this book is not about adding more to your life but about subtracting—the shedding of unrealistic expectations, cultural scripts of perfection, and harsh inner dialogues. Vere almost acts as a gentle archaeologist, inviting readers to brush away the layers of shame and “not-enoughness” to rediscover what was always there: worthiness and capacity. Few books in this genre center so strongly on permission—permission to go slow, to stumble, to not have a linear path.

Her trauma-informed lens gives the book its depth. Many self-help works overlook how personal history shapes our pace of change, but Vere insists that acknowledging wounds is not weakness—it is wisdom. This perspective shifts the tone from “fix yourself” to “befriend yourself,” which is radical in a culture obsessed with optimization.

The reflective prompts are deceptively simple, but they are designed less as tasks and more as mirrors. Instead of directing readers to “do better,” they invite you to notice—notice where your self-talk sabotages you, where external pressure dictates your choices, where your own values might gently redirect you toward sustainability.

I also appreciated the imagery woven throughout. The titular myth of the light switch isn’t just clever; it becomes a thread tying the whole work together. The metaphor reframes the false promise of instant brightness into an understanding that light comes gradually—sometimes as a flicker, sometimes as dawn.

This book does not celebrate speed; it celebrates durability. In a marketplace full of quick fixes, The Light Switch Myth feels almost countercultural. It’s not a guide to becoming “new” overnight—it’s a companion to becoming more yourself, over time.

Written by Emma Oct 1, 2025 (Goodreads.com)

Logo for Todays Read with As Seen on caption.
Logo for Todays Read with As Seen on caption.

From Critic to Compassionate Ally — The story of The Light Switch Myth

Kerisma Vere’s journey to wellness was not a straight line.

Like many, she struggled with an inner critic that constantly undermined her efforts. “You’re not good enough,” “You’ll never change.” “You have to get it perfect.” These were the harsh words she battled daily in her younger years. . However, rather than letting these thoughts define her, Kerisma chose to challenge them. Through more than a decade of dedicated work on the relationship she has with herself , She learned to transform her inner critic into an inner coach. Today, as author of The Light Switch Myth: A Beginner’s Guide to Realistic and Sustainable Change and founder of Towards Wellness Coaching , Kerisma helps others do the same by embracing a gentler, more compassionate approach to change and to themselves.

The Path to Coaching and Writing

Kerisma’s journey to coaching and writing was shaped by her struggles with self-criticism and the pursuit of personal growth. She learned that traditional self-improvement methods, focused on willpower and discipline, often create shame and guilt rather than lasting change. She discovered that true transformation begins with self-compassion. Shifting from harsh self-criticism to compassionate encouragement made change more accessible and enjoyable. This shift helped sustain the behaviors that lead to lasting results. Compelled to share her insights, Kerisma wrote The Light Switch Myth, challenging the quick-fix mentality and advocating for a sustainable approach to change, addressing the deeper components that hinder lasting transformation.

A Unique Perspective on Personal Transformation

Her personal experiences laid the groundwork for her coaching practice. Kerisma draws from over 55 years of lived experience, 35 years of working with skilled counselors and coaches, and more than a decade of wellness coaching, to offer a unique perspective on personal transformation. She emphasizes that change doesn’t come from forcing oneself to be better but from learning to be kind to oneself throughout the process.

“We need to meet ourselves where we are at and offer ourselves a helping hand to be able to create change from a place that is meaningful and will last. Coming down hard on ourselves or pressuring ourselves to be someone or somewhere we are not yet, only makes our struggle more painful and results in less progress not more.”

The Power of Compassion

In working with others and in healing aspects of her own past, Kerisma noticed a recurring theme: harsh self-judgment and unrealistic and impossible expectations we place on ourselves. She realized that almost all of us have this inner critic and that despite a culture that teaches us to be strict and demanding of ourselves that it always works against us.. Perhaps “cracking the whip” or “shoulding” ourselves will work in the short term but it always backfires and leads to bigger and longer lasting setbacks. Showing ourselves patience, understanding, and compassion towards the things we want for ourselves and the struggles we face in trying to achieve them helps us keep going and promotes progress. Kerisma recognized that the ways many of us had been taught to approach change was in fact the real root of the difficulty and repeated experiences of failure most people faced. Through her own trial and error she confirmed that leaders such as Brene Brown, Tara Brach, and Dr Kristen Neff were in fact providing a much more successful model of personal growth, transformation, quality of life and yes even creating change. She began incorporating these principles into her work, and her private life, guiding her clients to embrace a softer, more patient approach to personal growth. She wants anyone who doubts that being nice to yourself works better than being hard on yourself to know…it really does.

Coaching Philosophy: More Than Perfection

Kerisma’s coaching isn’t about achieving perfection. It’s about showing up for oneself, even when progress seems slow. It’s about working to develop a kinder, more unconditional, more supportive, and more attuned relationship with yourself. This naturally creates a foundation from which how we approach and sustain change brings about more meaning and more engagement, ultimately leading to less internal struggle and a more rewarding experience of engaging in the behaviours required to meet our goals. This philosophy is the cornerstone of The Light Switch Myth, which encourages readers to move from self-criticism to self-support by taking a closer look within.

“Creating a kinder, more compassionate relationship to self in tandem with aligning our goals to our values and the things that are important to us deep down, while adjusting day to day based on the information and feedback our internal world embodies and gives us, is in my opinion the true recipe for realistic and sustainable change.” excerpt from The Light Switch Myth Chapter 9

The Trauma-Informed Approach

Kerisma understands the impact of unacknowledged trauma and the frustration of generic self-help plans that didn’t fit her needs. For years, she struggled with self-blame and tried to force herself into methods that didn’t align with her experience. In her late 40s, she began working with a trauma-informed counselor, which deeply influenced her approach to coaching.

Now, Kerisma advocates for trauma-informed practices in wellness, addiction, recovery, and mental health services, believing they are essential for meaningful change. She recognizes that simply telling someone with a trauma history what to do can lead to further struggles. People must be met where they are, embracing their full histories and wounds.

Her coaching creates a safe space for clients to set personalized goals and address the emotional scars of past experiences. In The Light Switch Myth, Kerisma integrates trauma-informed practices, offering tools and insights for self-compassion, healing, and sustainable transformation.

A Commitment to Integrity and Accessibility

Kerisma’s approach to coaching stands out because of her commitment to integrity and compassion. She doesn’t promise quick fixes or guarantees. Instead, she empowers individuals to uncover their own answers and create change on their own terms. Her work is rooted in the belief that true wellness is about building a positive relationship with oneself, and this relationship requires respect, patience, and self-compassion. When we learn how to support and respond to ourselves with the same kind of compassion, encouragement, and unconditional love, many of us have always naturally offered others, we become our own best resource for navigating the ups and downs and twists and turns that lasting change involves.

Kerisma also believes in making her services accessible to vulnerable populations, ensuring that her approach is inclusive. She has created an integrity and accessibility policy to support individuals who may not have the resources to access traditional wellness services. This commitment to accessibility is part of what makes her approach unique and effective.

The Power of Vulnerability

Kerisma’s authenticity is one of her greatest strengths. She doesn’t present herself as someone who has all the answers, but rather as someone who has walked the difficult path of healing and transformation, a journey that continues even now. She shares her struggles and triumphs openly while encouraging others to learn to acknowledge them within themselves. Her writing and coaching are grounded in this authenticity, reminding others that healing is a personal, non-linear journey. She has long believed that when people have the courage to share openly and honestly we move to transform the stereotypes and harmful misinformation that has left many of us feeling alone and misunderstood. We begin to reshape the conversation to be more inclusive, compassionate, and helpful. But she also knows the importance of discerning with whom and to what extent as a means of ensuring continued safety in a world that is not always as receptive as we may want it to be.

The Core Message of The Light Switch Myth

In her book, The Light Switch Myth, Kerisma shows readers that meaningful change isn’t about perfection, not even about progress. It’s about learning to love ourselves for who we are in this moment and thus change becomes a hope for ourselves and not a condition of self worth. It’s about learning to accept and support ourselves unconditionally, even in moments of difficulty. Particularly in moments of difficulty. This is the core message she hopes to impart to anyone who feels stuck or overwhelmed or just plain tired of being mean to themselves. Her message, one that comes from personal experience, it is possible to create a softer place to land within.

About Kerisma Vere

Kerisma’s philosophy of change, rooted in self-compassion and trauma-informed practices, offers a refreshing alternative to quick-fix solutions. Through her book, The Light Switch Myth, coaching services, and community support, she provides tools and strategies for creating lasting, meaningful change.

Currently available on Amazon worldwide, she plans to expand the book to bookstores and libraries, as well as release an audio version and podcast. Take the first step toward transforming your relationship with yourself and creating sustainable change today. For more information on Kerisma’s services, visit Towards Wellness Coaching or connect with her on LinkedIn.

Stay Connected

kerismavere@gmail.com

Published by Towards Wellness Coaching

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